Kids, college, competition

[Life Long Learning]

100% well said!cheersmate

Getting into college is no great accomplishment. Getting out, now that's hard.

My observation around this topic is that 100% of the mainstream high school propaganda is about getting in. *as if that's enough.

Here's what I know about college:
100% of people can get into community college. 13% will get out with a degree.
More than 50% can get into a 4-year public university. Of the group admitted, about 55% will get out with a degree.
Roughly 20% can get into a competitive 4 year university. Of the group admitted, close to 80% will get out with a degree.
Roughly 5% can get into an elite 4 year university. Of the group admitted, close to 90% will get out with a degree.

Now, here's my opinion, the harder you have to push your child, the less internal motivation they have (obviously). The kids that are landing spots in elite and competitive universities are EXCEPTIONALLY motivated- and have been at that hard core level for YEARS by the time the application cycles open. It's also my opinion that these kids don't need their mommy telling them to kick but in Calculus class, they have the drive to succeed. Maybe it's nature, maybe it's nurture, I don't know- but the truth is that if your kid isn't driving their own boat in high school, there is little that Mom can do at that point. (which isn't to stop her from obsessing and trying of course....)

So, statistics and data show that ALL IN, roughly 34% of Americans have a bachelor's degree. That means, that despite the parent's best intentions, when left to make their own life decisions on a daily basis, 1/3 of the students power through and 2/3 don't. What makes it happen for those 1/3? I don't know, but all my money is on internal motivation.

This forum, generally speaking, is 100% about getting out.
People here have dropped the pretense about brand names, big 10 sports, and the "college experience." People here graduate. People here are also older. I don't know our graduation rate- but our pass rate for exams is high, it's always been high when we poll members. Better than 85% or so.

I don't know why it's so different- the fantasy for our 17 year olds and the reality for the 37 year old. I don't have the answer, but I do think about it a lot, and I think that many parents could save themselves significant disappointments and stress if they adjusted their expectations a bit. Let's face it, the parents boasting about Johnny getting into the University of My State is doing so prematurely imo.