Toxic Younger Sister

[2L8]

I'm sorry to keep bothering you with this thread but it's just an exhausting situation.  
When it comes to the situation : It all started with her giving me mean looks , I ignored it and she started doing passive-aggressive tactics ( ex: silent treatment) and when my mother confronts her she denies it and cries. Recently , my mom told her she didn't want to here it.To be mad for a week is very stupid
, specifically when you started the whole fiasco. My mom knows that it's a "premeditated" attack .


 
Last Friday I tried to commit suicide , I just couldn't deal with it anymore. As stupid as it sounds I never got how you can never bother someone and keep to yourself but still run into trouble. My dad and mom say I put too much energy into this situation but I can't stand on living in a house where there is tension.  I can't get up because my stomach is in intense pain and I feel depressed. What can I do?

Suicide is a very serious thing to consider. I'll definitely reiterate that a healthcare professional/therapist or counselor of some kind would be ideal. Human beings live longer lives than we realize, and there's so much beauty in the world one could miss out on. Situations change, and I can only hope that you wait it out long enough to see a better one. Your life matters. I know this has basically been said, but it's absolutely worth keeping in mind.

Regarding the stomach pain: do you know what exactly it is? I used to get stomach ulcers from stress/anxiety, and I can relate to depression keeping you from getting out of bed.

Regarding all of the above, the best thing for me was always meditation. It doesn't click with everyone, but it's absolutely worth the effort. Find a quiet, private spot if possible, and just take as long as you need to just focus on your breathing. A mantra could help, too. Starting out this could be anything. ('O bla di, o bla da, life goes on' or 'jah guru de va omm' if you happen to be a Beatles fan.) One that I've always liked was 'Sa ta na ma', which is Sanskrit for 'my true self' or something, but it's really the repetition of sounds that helps.
There's a cartoon called Steven Universe that happened to have an episode with a musical number on mindful meditation as a method of dealing with things like stress, anxiety and panic.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHg50mdODFM
There's also an app called Insight Timer with guided meditation, bells and ambient sounds and such. It's like headspace in that it's aim is to teach you to meditate.
https://insighttimer.com
If something like a nearby Buddhist retreat or a yoga retreat happens to coincide with a break from school, it may be worth looking into. Not that I'm trying to push anything really

And the house/living situation. I'd definitely avoid it as much as possible. Showers at the gym are helpful.

I'm not always super competent about replying quickly (to anything) but you're more than welcome to PM me about anything

 I have gastritis and I also have stomach ulcers. I do plan on taking a break from school as well , maybe going to visit some family and friends overseas or learning a new cuisine. It's just astonishing that I don't bother her but she torments me.