Affordable BS to MS Computer Science path

[subhuman]

I wish when I had considered joining the military before I got married and had a child.

That is probably a reason to consider it. Coast Guard is almost entirely CONUS, accompanied, and very safe. They will pay for your families housing, health care, and dental (wait till your kids need braces). They will pay off your school debts, train you in IT, pay for your college while your in, then the post 9/11 GI BILL pays for your college and housing when you get out. If you finish all of your college before you get out there are ways to transfer your GI Bill to pay for your children. Plus you could retire by 45 and get mailbox money and health care for the rest of your life, on top of whatever job you work when you get out. And yes they will teach you to swim.

Sorry that I sound like a crazed fanatic, but I went from being literally homeless, crashing on friends couches and landscaping for $8/hr to well making over $100K just from the experience and training I got in 5 years in the Navy. The only real regret I have in my life is deciding to get out after one and not finishing my twenty. I could be retiring in 2 years if I had stayed in.