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+--- Thread: Folk with elderly parents (/Thread-Folk-with-elderly-parents)
Folk with elderly parents - Sparklette - 10-29-2022
How do you stop them from doing tasks they are not supposed to do?
My mom is sneaking to the basement to do "laundry" despite family making sure the laundry is all done. Last night she washed basically a hand towel, her under garments from the day, and a few miscellaneous pieces that weren't urgent just so she could justify going to the laundry room. She not supposed to go downstairs because of depth perception issues post surgery
RE: Folk with elderly parents - ss20ts - 10-29-2022
Basically, you can't. They're adults. They're free to make their own choices and then they have to live the repercussions.
RE: Folk with elderly parents - dfrecore - 10-29-2022
(10-29-2022, 03:53 PM)Sparklette Wrote: How do you stop them from doing tasks they are not supposed to do?
My mom is sneaking to the basement to do "laundry" despite family making sure the laundry is all done. Last night she washed basically a hand towel, her under garments from the day, and a few miscellaneous pieces that weren't urgent just so she could justify going to the laundry room. She not supposed to go downstairs because of depth perception issues post surgery
My guess is, she's feeling a bit useless or bored, or both. Is there a way you can come up with other chores that she can do on the main level of the house instead? Crafts that she can do?
RE: Folk with elderly parents - bjcheung77 - 10-29-2022
You can always put a paper or sticky note on the door, but to be on the safe side, you can "lock" the door! You're not locking them in a room or anything, just to places you mention is off limits, that would be the easiest thing to do, no need to keep telling them and worrying where/which room they scooted off to...
RE: Folk with elderly parents - dfrecore - 10-30-2022
I mentioned this post to my mom, and she also said possibly guilt.
I'd probably just ask her what's going on, to see how to solve this problem. Work together.
RE: Folk with elderly parents - rachel83az - 10-30-2022
(10-29-2022, 03:53 PM)Sparklette Wrote: How do you stop them from doing tasks they are not supposed to do?
My mom is sneaking to the basement to do "laundry" despite family making sure the laundry is all done. Last night she washed basically a hand towel, her under garments from the day, and a few miscellaneous pieces that weren't urgent just so she could justify going to the laundry room. She not supposed to go downstairs because of depth perception issues post surgery
If she likes doing laundry, and wants to feel useful, can you have her fold and put away the laundry after someone else does the washing/drying?
RE: Folk with elderly parents - Sparklette - 11-01-2022
(10-30-2022, 01:09 PM)dfrecore Wrote: I mentioned this post to my mom, and she also said possibly guilt.
I'd probably just ask her what's going on, to see how to solve this problem. Work together.
Thank you for this. We were able to work out that what she's drawn to is not doing the laundry, but her habit of sitting in the recliner downstairs when she calls or emails social contacts. Moving that chair to the sun porch that's only 1 step off the living space/main floor and we can schedule a time to help her out there and back in and if she ventures there unaccompanied, it's less of a hazard than the entire flight of stairs to the basement
RE: Folk with elderly parents - Sandra R. Paulk - 12-13-2022
It's great when children and parents get along and try to help each other, at what age they were not. Take care of your parents!