(02-19-2018, 08:39 PM)dfrecore Wrote: Practice, practice, practice!  My 15yo daughter had a presentation, and she is quite reserved, and was terrified.  She practiced about a million times, until she could practically do it in her sleep.  Then, the day of the presentation, when I picked her up from school, she said "I was WAY better than everyone else!"  Not because she's so great at speaking, but because she was the only person who had her speech down pat, and didn't mess up, or forget anything.  Going in with some confidence helped tremendously, and the only way to get confidence, in this case, is to know the material.

She is no longer terrified to make speeches, although she wouldn't choose to do it.

Also, something to keep in mind: no one is really that interested in YOU personally.  I know that sounds rude, but I don't mean it to be at all - it's just that you're so wrapped up in how you look that you forget that everyone else in your class isn't all wrapped up YOUR speech - they are wrapped up in their own speeches!  Think about this - if someone in your class messes up or forgets a word or just doesn't do a great speech - how much will YOU personally care?  Not at all!  By the next day, after watching 20 of those things, you probably wouldn't be able to walk into class and remember what people talked about or how well they did, unless they were awesome and stood out or resonated with you for some reason.

So don't worry so much, and just practice the heck out of that speech until you are saying it in your sleep, and you will be fine!  Good luck!

(02-19-2018, 08:39 PM)dfrecore Wrote: Also, something to keep in mind: no one is really that interested in YOU personally.  I know that sounds rude, but I don't mean it to be at all - it's just that you're so wrapped up in how you look that you forget that everyone else in your class isn't all wrapped up YOUR speech - they are wrapped up in their own speeches!  Think about this - if someone in your class messes up or forgets a word or just doesn't do a great speech - how much will YOU personally care?  Not at all!  By the next day, after watching 20 of those things, you probably wouldn't be able to walk into class and remember what people talked about or how well they did, unless they were awesome and stood out or resonated with you for some reason.

(02-20-2018, 01:36 AM)jsd Wrote:

(02-19-2018, 08:39 PM)dfrecore Wrote: Also, something to keep in mind: no one is really that interested in YOU personally.  I know that sounds rude, but I don't mean it to be at all - it's just that you're so wrapped up in how you look that you forget that everyone else in your class isn't all wrapped up YOUR speech - they are wrapped up in their own speeches!  Think about this - if someone in your class messes up or forgets a word or just doesn't do a great speech - how much will YOU personally care?  Not at all!  By the next day, after watching 20 of those things, you probably wouldn't be able to walk into class and remember what people talked about or how well they did, unless they were awesome and stood out or resonated with you for some reason.

This is great advice, and relates to something in psychology called the spotlight effect:

"The spotlight effect is the phenomenon in which people tend to believe they are being noticed more than they really are. Being that one is constantly in the center of one's own world, an accurate evaluation of how much one is noticed by others is uncommon."

But even after realizing this, it's still hard to get over that we're not the center of everyone else's attention! Like dfrecore said, it sounds like a negative but it's simply the truth -- people are way more worried about themselves than they are worried about picking out all of your flaws!