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A former casino executive gets sentenced for college admissions scandal
#11
Man, be careful with French immersion. I did it from kindergarten to 5th and I believe that’s what messed me up with math. Math required me to actually use my brain in ways other classes didn’t and I think I started falling behind because I was having to deal with instruction in a foreign language coupled with that.

Great experience, though, if the program is good. I got a lot of exposure to the world at a young age that I might not have if I weren’t in the program.

Those issues can be compounded if they have ADHD or anything else. Just throwing that out there. I hope the school system does a better job of monitoring stuff like that now, but it’s something to watch out for in case they don’t.
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#12
(02-14-2022, 01:04 AM)bjcheung77 Wrote: My kids are still young, daughter is turning 10 in April, she's in 4th grade, my son is in 3rd grade, he's 8 and a half... they're about 19 months apart in age, their personalities are so different and are into other hobbies.  Anyways, I've asked them what they want to be when they grow up... daughter wants to be either a paramedic or nurse, son doesn't know yet but is leaning towards being a gamer or teacher.

We discuss things at home, as in asking how they're doing in French Immersion and how it's going with their friends/teacher relationships.  Further to that, we set them time for sports, summer school and summer camps, taking courses that may interest them.  I went with French Immersion as it is "my version" of a "private school" in a public school setting.  I find teachers put a bit more effort in teaching...

I don't really take control of my kids life and how they study, but I do have "regulations/rules".  Finish homework before they can use the computer, they can do whatever they want, I don't even have a filter or anything setup for the Laptops, I let them do what they want on the phones/ipads as well, such as WhatsApp/WeChat with their friends and make funny pictures or videos, etc.

I think it's a good idea to work with the kids towards their goals, but also at the same time, give them the freedom to make their own choices.  We like to keep conversing at home to make sure the communication is there, we don't force our kids and say, you must be a ABC when you grow up or you must take XYZ at summer school.  We encourage them to do what they want, like drawing, music, sports, etc...

When the time comes for high school or even college, I hope to get them at least up to par with their classmates, my daughter is doing alright, my son's been the problem!  He gets in trouble at school often, he doesn't like following the rules and we've had a pediatrician referred, he's borderline ADHD like me.  Homeschooling so far is a no go, he's doing OK with the tutoring agencies though...

In conclusion, I will never tell them they have to go to the top research public university in the state.  I will just tell them to get an education they want and to their interests as long as they are learning and not just going to school to "slack off" or as a way to defer their entry into the workforce.

Absolutely. They have to be their own person and have their own personalities and passions.
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#13
(02-13-2022, 08:40 PM)Stanislav Wrote:
(02-13-2022, 12:20 PM)dfrecore Wrote: I do not get parent who care more about their kids' college situation than the kids themselves.  My favorite line to use with my kids: "I can't care more about your life than you do."

I can't care more about if they go to college, I can't care more about their grades, I can't care more about their jobs, I can't care more about who they choose to date, I can't care more about their futures.

I can.

I think expecting minors and "young adults" to have unskewed, rational priorities is unrealistic. So when they are asked to make decisions with lifelong consequences (college, loans), it is reasonable to try to steer them right to avoid catastrophes a parent can see and children ca'nt, due to lack of life experience, hormones, whatever. Of course, I'd draw a line way before committing felonies.

The article was about a parent paying their kids' way into college - which I suspect means the kid didn't have the grades to get in.  If that's the case, then the kid can't possibly do well in that college due to the rigor that the school demands.

I never said I expect a teen to make great decisions all the time.  I said I can't care more about their future than they do.  I cannot push them into things, there has to be SOME motivation on their end to succeed.  If they don't want to go to college, I cannot force them to do so.  I wouldn't even want to.  Lori Loughlin's daughter did not want to go to college AT ALL, let alone go to the one her mom tried to buy her way into (USC).  She quit school almost before it started.
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#14
(02-14-2022, 01:04 AM)bjcheung77 Wrote: My kids are still young, daughter is turning 10 in April, she's in 4th grade, my son is in 3rd grade, he's 8 and a half... they're about 19 months apart in age, their personalities are so different and are into other hobbies.  Anyways, I've asked them what they want to be when they grow up... daughter wants to be either a paramedic or nurse, son doesn't know yet but is leaning towards being a gamer or teacher.

We discuss things at home, as in asking how they're doing in French Immersion and how it's going with their friends/teacher relationships.  Further to that, we set them time for sports, summer school and summer camps, taking courses that may interest them.  I went with French Immersion as it is "my version" of a "private school" in a public school setting.  I find teachers put a bit more effort in teaching...

I don't really take control of my kids life and how they study, but I do have "regulations/rules".  Finish homework before they can use the computer, they can do whatever they want, I don't even have a filter or anything setup for the Laptops, I let them do what they want on the phones/ipads as well, such as WhatsApp/WeChat with their friends and make funny pictures or videos, etc.

I think it's a good idea to work with the kids towards their goals, but also at the same time, give them the freedom to make their own choices.  We like to keep conversing at home to make sure the communication is there, we don't force our kids and say, you must be a ABC when you grow up or you must take XYZ at summer school.  We encourage them to do what they want, like drawing, music, sports, etc...

When the time comes for high school or even college, I hope to get them at least up to par with their classmates, my daughter is doing alright, my son's been the problem!  He gets in trouble at school often, he doesn't like following the rules and we've had a pediatrician referred, he's borderline ADHD like me.  Homeschooling so far is a no go, he's doing OK with the tutoring agencies though...

In conclusion, I will never tell them they have to go to the top research public university in the state.  I will just tell them to get an education they want and to their interests as long as they are learning and not just going to school to "slack off" or as a way to defer their entry into the workforce.

One of the best pieces of advice was given to us by our pediatrician - she demanded there be no screen time, during school days, for the children. So, for my children (currently 20, 18 and 12), they were not allowed on TV, phones or computers from Monday to Thursday. Once they came home from school on Friday, they would quickly turn on the TV. We maintained this regimen until they were in the 8th grade. After that, it was almost impossible to control them from getting on their phones. 

I felt this had a huge impact on their ability to focus and create discipline within their lives. I thank their pediatrician for the impact this advice had on their lives.
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#15
a small update
Trial opens for ex-USC coach in college bribery scandal - ABC News (go.com)
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#16
more sentencing
Palo Alto parents sentenced in college admissions scandal | News | Palo Alto Online |
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#17
Test Taker Gets Jailtime
https://www.justice.gov/usao-ma/pr/test-...-sentenced
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